thing that make me cum

1. jeff

2. timbaland's new song "carry out" ft. justin timberlake.

OVERALL: the song is just straight sex. it automatically makes you think about getting/giving head in an elevator only moments before busting into your hotel room and being bent over the bathroom sink. case in point: the lyric "you look good, you must taste heavenly."

THE VIDEO: this video reaffirms why women are the straight SHIT. the girls in the video are all smoking hot and dressed up as pin-up carhops, costumed french maids, and girls in lingerie eating cupcakes. neon lights + dimmed background= mmmm. don't get me wrong- a room full of hot guys in waiter's outfits would be fine by me, but these girls are bangin. yeah fellas, you wish you were us, and yes, we do grope our own tits. they really are that awesome.

TIMBALAND: Timbaland is a man whom, I feel, doesn't receive enough credit for his contributions to music. Timbaland has been around for two decades as a producer, most notably for Aaliyah, Justin Timberlake and Nelly Furtado. As a producer he has never had a major album produced by him not shoot to multiple Top 10 statuses. His production guaranteed Timberlake's solo stardom and infused the club scene/top 40 with Nelly Furtado, who previously had a flowy, folksy style. After years of producing Timbaland finally recorded his own CD borrowing friends such as Furtado and Timberlake for talent and also exposing the world to Keri Hilson. The CD was a hit and is easily one of the most amazing albums put out in the past 5 years.

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE: anything that can said about this man most likely has something to do with "sex." he's one of those guys that i'm pretty sure has mind control powers he uses to entrance you and make you wet at any time he pleases. it's not his looks. i'm not a fan of blondies, but even i can admit that he looks 180 degrees of hot from what he looked like in the n'sync days. it's not the looks, but rather the flawless transformation of pubic opinion towards him while still being regarded positively. not only positively, but as one of the innovators of pop music in the last decade. he seamlessly went from a teenage boy band pop star dating queen of pop britney spears, to a sophisticated, talented and devilshly sexy man who dates some of the classiest women in hollywood. why is timberlake the shit? because of orgasm-inducing lyrics such as "now is it full of myself to want you full of me?" and "do you like it well done, cause i do it well. cause i'm well-seasoned if you couldn't tell."

and now you know what makes me cum as of 3/30/2010.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRdHsuuXxfk

you were totally NOT worth it.

one year later and i still have a broke-ass hand due to a horrendous air hockey accident.
it was totally NOT worth it.

larry the creeper

hooray for my first official follower, my creepy friend larry lo!
creepy runs in larry's family- his father is a gynecologist.

larry first creeped on me when i was in the hospital the first time i found out i had pulmonary emobli, august 27-september 3, 2008. i thought larry was in high school and doing volunteer work, like i had to do when i went to mc clatchy. turns out he was in college, went to my college, and lived 4 doors down from my parents. he brought me extra caffeine free pepsi and saltines, which were pretty much the only things i ate while in the hospital. he promised to take me to red robin
(yum) but has yet to deliver, he's a chelsea fan (FUCK YAH BRAH), a nursing major and is adorable.

larry lo, here's to you! la chaim!

newerish

the google sidebar on my browser has an entry of "how much is a labioplasty."

i think that's an appropriate place to start.
this world is gigantic, and it's definitely not flat. there are some cool places (switzerland, alabama), there are some okay places (new york city) and there are some fucking horrible places (bakersfield, anywhere in nevada, the siberian steppes).
i've got friends in all those types of places. i don't talk to them often enough, i don't see them as much as i would prefer, and on a regular basis i will get the reaction of "holy shit, you're doing what with your life now? weren't you just a ______________ (high schooler/wannabe chola/econ major/blonde)?
this blog is a way to easily convey information to all those people who are in a different time zone than me, who are halfway around the world from me, who are a text message away from me but are too lazy for an actual conversation. it's for the people who get tired of lurking someone interesting or hot and settle for lurking someone sort of interesting and decent looking. it's for the people who want to blackmail me in some way (to this point i will say: go ahead. i'm honest about everything i say and i will rarely not answer a question, no matter how uncomfortable or angry it may make me).
deciding whether to keep it PC and let my parents in on it so they can keep up or not... probably not.

current stats
school: graduating from CSU Sacramento on May 22, 2010 with my B.A. in Psychology
accepted to the Master's Program in Forensic Psychology at the University of Denver
waiting for a reply from the Master's Program in Forensic Psychology at CSU Los Angeles

job: tissue recovery assistant for Sierra Eye and Tissue Donation Services. I work with consented post-mortem (ie dead) donors (male/female, senior/adult/teenager/child/baby). I assist the Recovery Coordinator in preparation
of the body for donation as well as associated duties.

relationship status: in a relationship with jeff romero, 23, graduated
from the University of Utah School of Business in 2008 with a double
major in Marketing and Information Systems. Is currently a substitute teacher and drummer in the band Reviver.

height/weight/hair color/eye color: 5'11, 164lbs, Black, Brown

extras: two dogs, delilah and tycho, both rescues. live in a house with a roomate i hate.

i specialize in the study of psychopaths (called psychopathy) and are particularly interested in the emotional deficits that psychopaths display, notably lack of guilt, empathy or remorse. i have been attempting to integrate the implications of animal cruelty into my research papers and presentations, whether during general psychotherapeutic assessment or specifically pertaining to psychopaths.

i enjoy meals of bbq'd chicken, corn on the cob, biscuits with honey butter and watermelon immensely, which is exactly why i have concluded that i was born to live in the south.
i have been attempting to convince my boyfriend that i am an idiot for several months now, and i don't think he's buying it. lately i have been attempting to prove it and feel that i will soon be successful. it's not that i want him to dislike me, it's just that i want to prove i'm right.

i am severely narcissistic, and i feel comfortable enough to tell you this. i know that i'm fucking awesome but i can definitely hold my own in the self-deprecation olympics. i've fucked up a lot- i was engaged to an asshole who liked to exercise physical violence, i dropped out of UC Davis because i hated it, i got suckered into the Twilight mania, i like Chef Boyardee raviolis... but mostly, yeah, i'm fucking awesome.

i've got a lot of awesome friends. how i've met them and why we've stayed friends are stories unto themselves. a lot of my awesome friends are exes. exes are the most awesome friends in the world because they are severely protective of you and they'll call you out on your bullshit. the shitty exes, well, they're responsible for a lot of other awesome friends i have. it's a huge "fuck you" when i think about the fact that i'm better friends with people they introduced me to than they are. all my other friends are awesome too. i've got friends that ask to borrow my hoodie because theirs is covered in jizz. i've got friends who audibly fart while looking a stranger dead in the eye and then say "who was that?," i've got friends who only talk about masturbation, i've got friends who can only talk french. i've got friends who visit me in the hospital every day i'm in there. i've got friends who sneak into my house at night and leave presents at my door, who drunk text me and say nice shit that makes me cry, who let me tell them horrible jokes and put up with my mountain dew code red addiction.

my boyfriend in the real fuckin deal. we met through mutual friends (thank you alvino/robby/zach/mark/andrew) in denver, post-christmas/pre-new years 2009/10. i came home on january 4, 2010 and i knew he was it. he came to the same conclusion shortly after. he puts up with me, he loves me, my friends love him, it's easy. long distance relationships are totally sweet and i am 100% into it. besides, when i figure out what i'm doing with my life he'll be moving with me so he might as well enjoy his freedom while he can. his hobbies are watching twilight, touring, eating burritos, telling me to shutup, making up words and not sleeping enough. we've already decided that andrew wk and american nightmare will provide most of the soundtrack to our wedding. and boy who agrees to this is a keeper.
if you find someone too good for you, marry them.
i get it now.

ps: this entry is long. sorry. most of you already know this shit. i promise i will get more amusing, use more expletives and talk about sex a lot more.